The Dance

There is a dance that we all do in life. Some of us do it really well, others struggle to find the rhythm or the right steps in the dance. When we over complicate our life, the dance becomes muddled and unclear. When we simplify our life, our steps seem to flow with the rhythm of life. To be successful and mentally strong in life, we must learn the graceful dance of life.

The dance in which I am referring to is that of balance. We must learn how to balance our lives carefully. Balance is essential in life, and without it, we miss opportunities, ruin relationships, and live a life filled with chaos and mental anguish. Balance creates peace and understanding in life. It removes unneeded stress, and it allows us the opportunity to breathe freely. Life’s dance of balance is much needed in a world filled with chaos.

How do we live a life of balance in a world filled with chaos? We have this innate problem within us to say “Yes” more than we should say “No”. People say “Yes” because they want to please others, they may be afraid of conflict, they might have poor personal boundaries, or they want to be liked. The more we say yes to things, the more chaotic our life becomes, and the more unbalanced we become in the dance of life.

There is a phenomenal author by the name of Bob Goff. He has a book called “Love Does”. It’s a must read, and I highly recommend it. In his book, he discusses that we need to learn to quit things in our life. He calls it “Quit something Thursday.” It doesn’t matter what it is, if it doesn’t need to be a part of your life, quit it. Let it go. Quitting something doesn’t mean you’re a failure. It means that you are learning to take control of your chaos and allowing yourself to become more balanced in the dance of life. Don’t keep filling your life with things you think you need to do, or with things you do not need to take responsibility for. Be okay with letting go of the chaos in your life.

Chaos comes in all shapes and sizes. It could be extra activities that you have said yes to, or extra work that you took responsibility for when you didn’t need to. It could also be personal choices that were made that jeopardize your physical and mental health. The more chaos we allow in our life, the more daunting the dance of life becomes. Life was never meant to be as taxing, stressful, and chaotic as we make it. Life was meant to be lived in joy, thanksgiving, and peace. We are the ones who have created the chaos we call life.

Our choices throughout life will determine the dance in which we choose to partake. The more chaos we allow in our life, the more rigid and unbalanced our dance will become. We may even get to a point in our life that our dance is more like a mosh pit –  a dance of survival rather than one of sweet rhythm and joy. The more chaotic our dance, the more we lose out on what really matters in our life. It is important that we take seriously the choices we make in our life and be aware of the chaotic imbalance that comes with some of those choices. 

Learn to say “No”. It’s okay to not be everything for everyone. Focus only on the “Yeses” that matter. Say yes to your mental health. Say yes to your physical health. Say yes to your children and your spouse. Beyond that, choose carefully what you say yes to. Please don’t misunderstand me, I am not saying you shouldn’t look for ways to help others. I am saying, be aware of the burdens on which you place yourself. You don’t have to take on that extra curricular activity. You don’t have to have your children in EVERY sport. You don’t have to go to every function someone invites you to. It is perfectly okay to have a life where your heart and energy are wrapped up in what brings you joy and happiness. Allow balance back into your life and dance with great rhythm, grace, and peace.