Be a Pharisee to Yourself

What Does It Mean to Be Legalistic?

In recent weeks and months, I have been reflecting on many aspects of my life, specifically my understanding of my Christian faith. I was raised in the church, and I cannot remember a time when my Christian faith was not a part of my life. This has come with deep struggles, frustrations, and a need to relearn and understand what it truly means to be a Christian. To be honest, I thought I knew what it meant to be a Christian. However, for most of my life, Christianity was little more than a label. Society often sees Christianity as a religion—a box you check when someone asks what religion you are. Here lies the problem: I don’t believe Christianity was ever meant to be merely a religion. Like many things, once people get their hands on what God created, we can change and manipulate it into something it was never meant to be. If we study the life of Jesus, we see that His desire is to help us understand the what and how of life. Jesus came to save us from the consequences of sin, and He wants nothing more than to teach us how to live.

Throughout my life, I have heard the terms legalism and Pharisaical used as warnings. I was told that legalism was bad and that we should never become Pharisaical. There is a part of me that wants to believe this teaching is good, but lately, I have considered whether I have missed a deeper meaning behind legalism and the Pharisees. At face value, legalism and the Pharisees are not necessarily bad. Legalism is focusing on the letter of the law—adhering to the rules and regulations within a system or structure. For the Pharisees, this was their life. They were focused on the Law. They knew every part of it and could quote it verbatim. Here is where the problem begins: the Pharisees knew the Law, but instead of focusing on their own lives and how they lived out the Law, they focused on others and expected them to follow the letter of the Law. However, when it came to living out the Law in their own lives, they made excuses for why they didn’t need to live according to the same standards they expected from everyone else. This is what it means to be Pharisaical. Don’t hold people to a standard that you yourself do not live by. More importantly, focus on what you do and how you live, and don’t expect others to live the way you believe you should be living.

Be a Pharisee to Yourself

I have come to the conclusion that legalism and being a Pharisee have a place in the life of a Christian, but not in the way they have often been presented throughout history. We are called to learn, interpret, and understand Scripture. We are called to follow Scripture and walk in its ways. As a Christian, I should know Scripture as well as the Pharisees knew the Law. I should then hold myself to the standards of Scripture. There should be no picking and choosing what I like and what I want to follow. It is about learning to live according to Scripture and adhering to its instruction and truth. Here lies the difference between being a Pharisee and being Pharisaical. It is not my job to demand that others live out Scripture. It is my job to teach what I know while focusing on my own actions and choices and how I align my life with Scripture. I can encourage others in their faith and in their walk with Jesus. As Paul told the Corinthians, “I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow” (1 Corinthians 3:6). It is not my job to demand growth. It is my job to encourage it.

I should be a Pharisee unto myself. I should read and study Scripture to learn and adhere to its instruction and truth. I should hold myself accountable to live according to Scripture without excuse or selfish bias. Jesus did not condemn the knowledge of the Law itself; He condemned the hearts and actions of those who knew the Law but failed to allow it to transform their lives. It ultimately comes down to my heart and how I allow Scripture to change me and make me holy—set apart—from the world.

Following Jesus Means Following His Commands

My choice to follow Jesus is about listening to Him and following His commandments. It is about adhering to His instruction. It is my responsibility to share the Gospel, love others, live differently from the world without judging others, and be a light in a darkened world. At no time should I force my faith on others. At no time should I expect others to do what I am unwilling to do myself. At no time should I preach the Gospel while living contrary to the truth I claim to believe. Jesus came to seek and save those who were lost. He came to share the hope of Heaven with the world. He sacrificed Himself so that those who believe in Him might have life and have it abundantly. It is my responsibility, as a Christian, to do the same. I may not be able to give someone eternal life, but I can share the life He has given me. I can point others toward Jesus in a loving way. This is my duty as a follower of Jesus.

The Cost of Following Jesus

If I find myself compromising my beliefs to be accepted by the world, I have to ask myself whether I am truly following Jesus. The moment I choose acceptance by the world over devotion to Jesus, I have left the narrow path. This is where personal legalism becomes important in my own life. I must be willing to hold myself accountable to God’s Word rather than compromise my beliefs for acceptance.

I can’t help but think of the rich young ruler who asked Jesus what good he had to do to gain eternal life. Jesus replied, “Why do you ask me about what is good? There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.” The rich young ruler asked, “Which ones?” Jesus replied by quoting the last five commandments from the Ten Commandments. The rich young ruler stated that he had kept all of those commandments and asked what he still lacked. Jesus responded with one of the most overlooked and poignant answers: “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” When the rich young ruler heard Jesus’ response, he went away sad because he had great wealth (Matthew 19:16–22, paraphrased).

Notice that Jesus began with commandments that nearly everyone can claim to follow—commandments that point toward being a “good person.” However, Jesus then added the deeper challenge: give up everything you hold dear and follow Him. Jesus wants complete devotion. He wants your everything. He wants to be your King. Why is this so difficult? Because Jesus asks us to give up our desires to undeniably serve and follow Him. He asks us to give up our need to be important, our desire to hold a specific title, and our tendency to choose ourselves over Him. This is the battle that has been raging since the fall of humanity. To be a follower of Jesus means making Him first in our lives without hesitation.

We Are Saved by Grace, Not Works

No, this isn’t easy. In fact, I would argue that it is nearly impossible without Jesus. We are sinners. We are fallen creatures with a deep desire and need to be reunited with the One who created us, yet instead of seeking Him, we often seek anything and everything else to fill the hole that only He can fill. It isn’t until we give Jesus our everything that we are truly free. We are saved through grace and not by our own doing.

This is where legalism becomes a problem. When we think that our own actions make us right with God, we miss the truth. We begin to believe that our actions and choices determine our redemption. The truth is that it is only through Jesus that we can be saved and redeemed. Legalism is important only when it comes to following the instructions and commandments of Scripture. To follow Jesus is to live by His commandments. After all, Jesus said, “If you love me, keep my commands” (John 14:15). As followers of Jesus, it is our responsibility to keep His commandments. To do this, we must consistently read, study, and follow Scripture—all of it, not just the parts we like.

Jesus Fulfills the Law

What Scripture am I talking about? Jesus didn’t come to give us a new Law, but rather to fulfill the Law. The Old Testament points us toward Jesus. The expectations given in the Old Testament were meant to show what it would take to be right with God. However, because of the sinful nature of humanity, it was impossible for us to fulfill the Law perfectly on our own. We needed a Savior who could follow everything and fulfill every aspect of the Law without compromise. This is where Jesus becomes everything we could never be. He took upon Himself the punishment we deserved for failing to fulfill the Law. He became the propitiation for our sins. It is only through Him that we have redemption and eternal life. It is only through Him that life becomes meaningful.

In return, He asks us to follow Him—to take ourselves off the throne and make Him King of our lives. Jesus Christ gave us specific commands about what it means to follow Him. After His ascension into Heaven, He gave His disciples the authority to teach and instruct us on what it looks like to be a true follower of Jesus. I don’t want you to forget, dear reader, that it is not by your own actions that you are made righteous or redeemed. It is only through the person and work of Jesus Christ that you and I have any chance of being made right with our Creator. However, unless we give up ourselves, cling to the cross of Christ, and follow Him, we will forever strive in vain to make ourselves right with God and consider ourselves “good.”

Holiness Means Being Set Apart

So why am I focused on legalism if we are not saved by our works? To put it plainly, following the commandments of Jesus and doing what He has instructed is what sets us apart from the rest of the world. As Peter wrote, “But just as He who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’” To be holy is to be different—to be set apart. How else are we to be different other than by following the commandments of Jesus? If we do not purpose within ourselves to be disciplined and intentional about following His commands, we will naturally make allowances for living like the world.

When We Fail

Please don’t misunderstand me. We will never be able to do this perfectly. We will mess up, make mistakes, and even give up following Jesus to pursue our own selfishness. What’s beautiful in all of this is that when we choose ourselves and the world over following Jesus, we can come back to Him through humility and repentance. Consider the words of Peter in the book of Acts: “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord” (Acts 3:19).

Be disciplined in your personal relationship with Jesus. Push yourself to become more like Him by doing what He has commanded. Live in a way that is separate from the world. Deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow Him (Matthew 16:24). And when you fall and choose the world over following Jesus, humble yourself, repent, and turn back to Him. He is gracious and loving and will meet you exactly where you are. Jesus cares about your heart more than your faults. Never forget that.

What About the Gray Areas?

So what do we do with all the gray areas in Scripture? I have learned that many of these gray areas ultimately come down to self-control. For example, Jesus never once told us that drinking alcohol was bad. He warned against drunkenness. To be drunk means we have given up control and surrendered control to a substance. However, if you are someone who has struggled with alcohol in the past or even now, I would encourage you to abstain from it altogether. For you, it may be necessary to establish strict personal boundaries when it comes to alcohol. This may be what is needed to keep you focused on denying yourself in order to follow Jesus.

There are many “gray” areas in life, and how we navigate those areas is by keeping our eyes on Jesus, submitting ourselves to Him, and, if we have a conviction about something, holding to that conviction personally without forcing others to accept our beliefs. I would encourage you to consider the position you allow those areas to have in your life. If something controls you, you may need stronger personal boundaries until you are strong enough to control it. If anything comes before Christ, you should consider what changes are necessary to put it back under His authority.

Keep Jesus at the Center

It is our responsibility to read, study, learn, and apply Scripture. We must be Pharisaical in our knowledge and understanding. It is our responsibility to hold ourselves to the instruction and commands found in Scripture, and there may be times when we must establish strict personal boundaries in certain areas of our lives to ensure that nothing comes before Jesus. We must never forget that our relationship with Jesus is not something we can force upon others or expect everyone else to experience in exactly the same way. What may be a point of conviction for us does not necessarily mean it needs to be a point of conviction for someone else.

We must guard ourselves from developing the kind of heart the Pharisees had when they questioned Jesus and placed expectations on others while failing to follow their own teaching. We must never forget that we are saved by grace through the cross of Jesus Christ, and it is only through His death and resurrection that we are redeemed. There is nothing we can do to earn God’s favor or purchase our redemption. Our personal discipline and obedience are not what save us. Instead, they are a response to the One who has already saved us.

Our goal, then, should be simple: Be a Pharisee to yourself. Study Scripture deeply. Know what you believe. Hold yourself accountable. Follow Jesus with everything you have. Establish personal boundaries where you need them. Pursue holiness. Repent when you fail. But when it comes to everyone else, lead with grace. Encourage. Love. Teach. Serve. Point people toward Jesus. Let God work in their hearts. Your job is not to force people to grow. Your job is to faithfully follow Jesus and invite others to walk alongside you.

Redefining the “Perfect” Marriage

​Conventional wisdom holds that a “perfect marriage” is a myth—at least if your definition of perfection is a relationship devoid of conflict, ego, or impatience. If perfection is defined as a static peak where no further growth is possible, then the skeptics are right. Such a state would be both impossible and stagnant.

​However, I want to challenge that traditional definition. We must remember that perfection does not exist as a final product. Instead, it lives within the journey itself. The process becomes perfect through how we love, how we respond, how we humble ourselves, and how we nurture our relationships. I want to suggest that perfection is found in the process—deeply rooted in how we choose to grow.

​The Messy Reality

​For a long time, I believed my marriage could never be perfect. We are just two imperfect people trying to navigate a messy life together. In our early years, my wife and I had some epic battles. There was yelling, door-slamming, and even a flying frying pan—which, in hindsight, I probably deserved.

​We are both stubborn and desperate to be right. Yet, after seventeen years, I’ve reached a new conclusion: if perfection is found in the process, then I believe I have a perfect marriage. No matter how intense the friction, there was always a shared heartbeat between us that refused to quit. No matter the argument, we always returned to one another in love.

​The Foundation: Perfection Through Grace

​We must acknowledge that we are not perfect, and on this side of eternity, we never will be. However, we are constantly being perfected through the love and grace of Jesus Christ. We are called to be holy because He is holy, but holiness isn’t a trophy we win—it is a nature brought out of us through refinement.

​In marriage, this perfection manifests when we choose to kill our ego and embrace the call to selflessly serve. We won’t do it flawlessly, but perfection isn’t found in the final product; it is found in the daily, intentional choices we make to be more like Him.

​The Three Pillars of a “Perfect” Process

​A marriage achieves a form of “functional perfection” when it moves away from the view of a “finished product” and toward a “way of life” built on three active traits:

​Humility: The willingness to be wrong and the openness to learn from your partner.
Ownership: Taking full credit for your contributions to both the successes and the failures of the union.
Responsibility: The proactive commitment to nurture the relationship every day, regardless of the current “weather.”

​As Jimmy Carr once noted, “We all have to serve somebody; why not let it be the person we love?” When we choose our spouse over our ego, we are seeing love in its most active, perfect form.

​The Beautiful Mend

​Here is the clincher: none of this is possible without a foundation built on Jesus Christ. I don’t say this to sound preachy or overly spiritual; I am simply sharing the truth of what has proven itself true in my own life time and time again.

Jesus cares deeply about our hearts. He wants us to become more like Him, which means learning to love selflessly. When we commit to growing and loving our spouse the way Jesus loves us, perfection is no longer a human achievement. Instead, it is found in the very process of becoming more like Him.

Perfection isn’t about never falling; it’s about the grace and accountability with which you both choose to get back up. A perfect marriage isn’t one that never breaks—it’s one that is constantly and beautifully being mended.

​There is an old saying: “The more you do it, the better you get.” Don’t expect to reach a state where you no longer have to try. Instead, focus on perfecting the way you love, respond, and humble yourself. That is where the beauty lives.

​Join the Conversation

​Is “perfection” a word we should be using in marriage, or does it create too much pressure? How would your relationship change if you viewed perfection as a process rather than a destination? Leave a comment below—I’d love to hear your perspective.

The Radical Shift: Trading Earthly Ambition for Heavenly Wisdom

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruit, unwavering and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.” (James 3:13-18)

“Who is wise and understanding?” 

In this passage, James employs two key Greek terms to address the core of the human condition:

​Wise (sophos): This refers to one whose actions are governed by piety and integrity. Piety denotes a reverent devotion to God—showing deep, profound respect—while integrity represents moral uprightness. Therefore, to be “wise” is to live a life governed by one’s faith, characterized by respect for others and consistent moral conduct.

​Understanding (epistemon): This term denotes intelligence and being endued with knowledge. It represents the quality of mind that leads to true perception and insight.

​These words strike at the heart of humanity, as most people consider themselves wise and understanding in their own way. Yet, James challenges this self-perception. When he asks, “Who is wise and understanding among you?” he is not looking for a show of hands. If we were standing in a room and heard this question, many of us might silently pride ourselves on our own wisdom.

​James is effectively calling his audience out. He recognizes that we often rely on our own definitions of intelligence and morality. He does not invite a debate; instead, he uses this rhetorical hook to disrupt our pride and arrogance, stripping away our self-assuredness so he can humble us with the simple, transformative instruction that follows.

“Let them show it by their good life, by the deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.”

If pride is what leads us to inflate our own sense of wisdom, its antidote is humility. James insists that true wisdom and knowledge are not merely spoken; they are demonstrated. Wisdom is not a lecture—it is a lifestyle. It is lived out through deeds performed in the profound humility that true wisdom inspires. But how does wisdom produce humility?

​To answer this, we must first define true wisdom. As the book of Proverbs reveals:

​“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge… Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil” (Proverbs 1:7; 3:7).

​At the heart of this passage is the Hebrew word yirah, translated as “fear” or “reverence.” This mirrors the piety found in James’s definition of sophos. True wisdom does not originate from worldly institutions or earthly intellect; it is found exclusively in submitting to and revering God. When we insist on being “wise in our own eyes,” we become “puffed up.” As the Apostle Paul noted in 1 Corinthians 8:1, “Knowledge puffs up, while love builds up.”

​Pride is the foundational sin behind this arrogance. It is the root that severed humanity’s relationship with the Creator, fueled the repeated downfalls of Israel, led to the crucifixion of Christ, and continues to drive the chaos in our world today. Pride is the direct antithesis of wisdom.

​James argues that wisdom should be seen, not just heard. If we truly possess wisdom and understanding, it will be evident in our actions—specifically, in how we treat others. If we profess wisdom while living in a state of hypocrisy, pride, or arrogance, our words are rendered hollow. In the economy of God, actions speak far louder than words.

​With this established, James refocuses our attention from our outward appearance to the very seat of our intentions: the heart.

“But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not boast about it or deny the truth.”

James continues his letter by employing a powerful metaphor: the contrast between bitter and fresh water. Earlier, he noted that a single spring cannot yield both types of water; now, he applies that imagery to the inner state of the human heart.

​While James previously linked “bitter” to the corruption of our speech, he now uses it to describe our inward motives and intentions: “If you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your heart…” (James 3:14).

​As Strong’s Topical Lexicon notes:

​”The adjective ‘bitter’ denotes literal bitterness of taste and, by natural extension, the inner bitterness that expresses itself in harsh words or envious attitudes. Scripture consistently uses the idea of bitter versus sweet to draw moral and spiritual contrasts, underscoring that what springs from the heart will inevitably flavor both speech and conduct.”

​The word James uses for “envy” is the Greek zelos. While zelos can be translated as “zeal”—which, when applied to righteous pursuits, is a virtue—it becomes destructive when paired with wrong intentions. Selfishness, the inevitable byproduct of pride, turns this zeal into a weapon.

​When we prioritize ourselves above others, we lose the ability to listen, learn, or discern. We become convinced of our own infallibility, viewing the world through a distorted lens of our own making. This selfishness blinds us, causing us to vilify anyone who challenges our perspective and rendering us unable to distinguish between truth and falsehood. Ultimately, the more we boast in our bitter envy and selfish ambition, the more we choose to deny the truth about our own condition.

“Such ‘wisdom’ does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic.”

James describes this “wisdom” as earthly, unspiritual, and demonic because it originates solely within the fallen human ego. We see this pattern established at the very dawn of humanity: the first humans believed they were choosing a higher wisdom when they ignored God’s explicit instruction, effectively choosing their own path over His.

​Ever since that grave mistake, humanity has repeatedly chosen this earthly, unspiritual, and demonic path. It is a perpetual struggle; we are prone to think we are wise in our own eyes, and unless we actively submit to the authority of God, we will continue to deceive ourselves.

​As Isaiah 55:8–9 captures so perfectly:

​“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

​Ultimately, whatever we perceive as “wisdom” from our own limited perspective is trivial compared to the infinite, transcendent wisdom of God.

“For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.”

Proverbs 16:18 offers a sobering warning: “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” When we allow envy and selfish ambition to lead us, our lives inevitably spiral into disorder. By developing tunnel vision for our own limited wisdom, we begin to sow seeds that yield a harvest of strife and evil.

​What does this “evil” born of selfish ambition actually look like? We need only observe the state of the world to see the fruit of this mindset. Selfishness acts as the root of nearly every systemic evil we encounter, and that selfishness is always built upon a foundation of pride.

​This pride acts as a catalyst for a devastating chain reaction:

  • ​Relational Erosion: Hatred, animosity, resentment, and treachery.
  • ​Emotional Turbulence: Despair, intolerance, impatience, and aggression.
  • ​Moral Decay: Cruelty, malice, corruptness, infidelity, and arrogance.
  • ​Lack of Discipline: Indulgence and impulsivity.

​Ultimately, all of these paths converge into a single destination: total chaos. This is the inescapable result when selfish ambition replaces the wisdom of God as the guiding force of our lives.

“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is for of all pure;”

In the original Greek, the word “pure” (hagnos) implies a state of being innocent or undefiled. Heavenly wisdom is defined by this purity; it is entirely free from selfish or malicious intent. It is blameless, guiltless, irreproachable, and harmless.

​Because this wisdom is rooted in the character of God, it is true in all things—it remains constant regardless of worldly opinion. Just as Christ was “not of this world,” the wisdom He offers transcends our earthly systems. It does not bargain with pride or selfishness, but instead clings firmly to humility and innocence.

“; then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruit, unwavering and without hypocrisy.”

In his letter to the Galatians, Paul lists the “fruit of the Spirit”: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22–23). Heavenly wisdom aligns perfectly with these qualities. James outlines a specific progression for this wisdom: it is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruit, unwavering, and without hypocrisy.

​The Temperament of Heavenly Wisdom

​Peaceable: This is the discernment to know when to speak and when to remain silent. Loudly professing knowledge can often create discord rather than enlightenment. True wisdom recognizes that not everyone is prepared to receive truth; forcing it upon others often leads to division, the very antithesis of heavenly wisdom.

​Gentle: Gentleness concerns the delivery of truth. It is not harsh or demanding, but rooted in love and kindness. As the adage goes, “It’s not what you say, but how you say it.” If we share wisdom with force and aggression, the message is inevitably lost.

​Reasonable: A reasonable disposition is one that readily listens and remains open to truth. It does not cling to ideas out of selfish pride or a need to be “right.” Instead, it listens to understand rather than listening merely to respond, always anchoring itself in the foundations of righteousness.

​Full of Mercy and Good Fruit: Mercy is compassion in motion—it is a physical act of service toward those who are hurting and in need. Jesus emphasized this when He told the Pharisees, “I desire mercy, not sacrifice” (Matthew 12:7). Good fruit is the evidence of this mercy; it is the proof of our inward intentions. As Jesus taught in Matthew 7:15–20, just as a tree is identified by its fruit, our motives are revealed by our actions. Heavenly wisdom does not seek self-promotion but humbles itself to encourage and better others.

​Unwavering: In a world where cultural “wisdom” shifts with the latest trends, heavenly wisdom remains steadfast. It does not sway with the tides of society or succumb to political and ideological agendas. As Paul notes in Ephesians 4:14, this stability keeps us from being “tossed back and forth by the waves” of cunning and deceitful teachings. It stands firmly on the foundation of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

​Without Hypocrisy: While some translate this as “sincere,” the phrase “without hypocrisy” hits closer to James’s core concern. Earthly wisdom often falls into the trap of “do as I say, not as I do,” much like the hypocrisy seen in the Sadducees and Pharisees, who prioritized position and power over integrity. Heavenly wisdom rejects this duplicity; it cares more about authentic righteousness than selfish ambition. Wisdom shared through a lens of hypocrisy is, ultimately, no wisdom at all.

“And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.”

One of the defining qualities of heavenly wisdom is its “good fruit,” and as James points out, the primary fruit of such wisdom is righteousness. But what exactly is righteousness?

​Far from being a mere checklist of human rule-following, righteousness is a state of moral purity and relational integrity that mirrors the heart of God. To live righteously is to live in a way that reflects God’s character—a character that is inherently humble, selfless, loving, merciful, patient, and good. Righteousness is the active, lived-out expression of these qualities in our own daily lives.

​Crucially, the Bible tells us that this fruit of righteousness is sown, or planted, in peace by those who make peace. If we look at the original language, “peace” can also be translated as “quiet.” Therefore, true righteousness is planted in a quiet life.

​There is a profound dignity in a quiet life. It is a life that doesn’t demand the spotlight through boasting or self-seeking. It chooses peace over being right, steering clear of belligerence and antagonistic behavior. By refusing to be obtrusive or meddlesome, a quiet soul respects the boundaries of others. It shuns the brashness of the world, proving that you don’t need to be audacious to be impactful.

Final Thoughts

​We are often told that wisdom is merely a byproduct of age—that as we grow older, we inevitably grow wiser. While age can produce knowledge, it is not the defining mark of true wisdom. Wisdom is not something we possess; it is something we demonstrate.

​If you consider yourself wise or full of understanding, the proof is not in your words, but in your life. It is shown through the humility of your deeds. Wisdom does not sprout from the soil of selfishness or envy; it flourishes in the quiet, peaceful life of one surrendered to God.

​Heavenly wisdom is marked by purity—it operates without hidden motives or secret agendas. It is peaceable, gentle, full of mercy, unwavering in its convictions, and entirely free from hypocrisy. To live this way, we must keep our egos in check, submit daily to the authority of Christ, repent of our selfishness, and humbly take up our cross to follow Him.

​When we proclaim our own wisdom, we ironically prove that we lack the very understanding that comes from above. As the Apostle Paul exhorted: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18).

​Let your life be a quiet, loving surrender to God. Live in such a way that your good deeds become a testimony, leading others to see your life and, ultimately, glorify your Father in heaven.

Call to Action: Living Out Heavenly Wisdom

The world is loud, aggressive, and often obsessed with being “right.” But as we have explored, the wisdom that comes from heaven is quiet, peaceable, and gentle. It does not demand the spotlight—it simply shines in the darkness of a chaotic world through good deeds and humble actions.

Now, I challenge you to take this off the page and into your life:

Audit Your Intentions: This week, when you feel the urge to “win” a debate or prove your point, pause. Ask yourself: Is this motivated by a desire for truth, or by bitter envy and selfish ambition?

Practice the “Quiet Life”: Identify one area in your life—a difficult conversation, a workplace tension, or a social media post—where you can choose peace over being right. What does it look like to be gentle in that specific situation?

Seek Out the “Hidden Treasures”: Since true wisdom is found in the fear and reverence of the Lord, spend time this week in Proverbs or James. Don’t just read to accumulate knowledge; read to apply your heart to understanding.

Join the Conversation:

Do you find it difficult to maintain a “quiet life” in today’s loud culture? Which of the characteristics of heavenly wisdom—pure, peaceable, gentle, reasonable, merciful, unwavering, or sincere—do you find the most challenging to live out?

The Price of Progress: What Technology Has Taken From Us

I am an ’80s and ’90s kid. I grew up without social media, and the internet was literally attached to the wall. I didn’t have a cell phone. Most of my time was spent outside—riding my bike, climbing trees, and playing with friends. I played baseball and studied every airplane that flew overhead. I spent very little time in front of a screen. I had few cares in the world, and as a kid, I felt free.

Around my senior year of high school, technology began making a significant push into everyday life. Cell phones became more common. Social media started to gain traction. Life still felt relatively free—there wasn’t constant stress or daily anxiety—but something was shifting.

By the time I reached college, a new kind of society had formed. Cell phones were everywhere. Technology wasn’t just a tool; it was a way of life. Social media became a daily staple, and suddenly everyone knew everyone else’s business. Stress levels seemed to rise. Mental health struggles became more visible and more prevalent. Life no longer felt as simple or as free.

As technology embedded itself deeper into society, we began to see the cost of constant connection. Many argue that mental health declined and suicide rates increased. Life grew more complicated, overwhelming, and pressure-filled. Instead of focusing inward—on family, friendships, and personal growth—our attention shifted outward to the nonstop flow of global opinions, conflicts, and comparisons.

Our society has become neurotic, overstimulated, narcissistic, and entitled. But why? When I was a child, life had its problems, but they were nothing compared to the problems we see today.

The more we have allowed technology to take on a dominant role in our lives, the less free our lives seem to be. We traded simplicity for constant connection. Instead of having few worries, we now live in a state of continual anxiety—plugged into every crisis, every opinion, and every conflict happening anywhere in the world.

Technology has pitted us against one another. It has intensified anxiety, depression, worry, envy, selfish ambition, pride, arrogance, and ignorance. Rather than strengthening our society, it has weakened the quality of our relationships and diminished how we treat each other.

Respect and courtesy have eroded. We have become a society willing to say abhorrent things to others with little regard for dignity or decency. The screen has created distance.

We no longer seem to know how to communicate well or hold meaningful, respectful conversations. We have become conditioned to demand what we want immediately, losing the discipline of patience and the character built through waiting.

Instead of focusing on ourselves—on the discipline, humility, and growth required to become better people—we fixate on others. We highlight their flaws, dissect their mistakes, and inject our “great” wisdom about how they should live. In doing so, we neglect self-examination.

Our youth are overstimulated, anxious, and often mentally overwhelmed, instead of being free to experience the simplicity of childhood. Many have come to believe that friendship is measured by likes and followers rather than by the depth of real relationships with the people closest to them.

Adults, too, are affected. Truth is often overshadowed by fickle feelings, easily swayed and shaped by mainstream media narratives. Instead of seeking understanding, we react. Instead of building one another up, we tear one another down.

Technology has brought remarkable advances and undeniable benefits. Yet at the same time, it has changed the human experience. Social media, in particular, has given people the freedom to share thoughts and opinions instantly—often without accountability. As Mike Tyson once said, “Social media made y’all way too comfortable with disrespecting people and not getting punched in the face for it.”

Technology promised connection and progress. What it has often delivered is comparison, outrage, distraction, anxiety, depression, and entitlement. The qualities that have come with technology have eroded away the very people we were meant to be. We no longer see value in others and in relationships. We are now consumed with ideologies, politics, and the war on the mind.

We need to get back to simplicity. Technology has become the god this world looks to for everything. It has overtaken nearly every aspect of humanity. And with AI on the move, it has removed our ability to think critically and reason carefully. We believe everything we see and read on our screens. Instead of taking the time to seek understanding, we lazily accept whatever we are told as truth.

Technology promised progress and connection. Instead, it has helped create a society increasingly bent on competing with, criticizing, and, at times, destroying one another.

Perhaps it is time to rediscover the value and importance of simplicity.

The Wisdom That Leads to Real Change

There are two kinds of change in life: outward change and inward change.

Outward change happens around us. It includes shifts in our circumstances or environment—moving to a new home, losing a job, receiving a promotion, or even changing your appearance. These changes affect our situation, and most of us experience them regularly. They are simply part of life.

Inward change, however, happens within us. It involves our heart, mindset, attitudes, and beliefs. This type of change requires humility and vulnerability. It asks us to examine ourselves honestly and admit that there may be areas where we need to grow.

Of the two, inward change is usually more difficult. Outward change happens to us; inward change requires something from us. It demands self-awareness, courage, and a willingness to take responsibility for who we are becoming.

Humanity has long struggled with humility and vulnerability. In many cultures, these qualities are viewed as weaknesses. As a result, pride and arrogance often take their place. We naturally want to be right. When we realize we are wrong, we face a choice: humble ourselves and admit it, or protect our pride and insist we were right all along.

Admitting we are wrong is not easy. It requires vulnerability—especially in front of the very people we may have tried to impress or prove ourselves to. It means lowering our defenses and acknowledging our mistakes. Yet real growth depends on this willingness. To become a better version of ourselves, we must be able to recognize and confess our faults. That is why inward change is so challenging—it calls us to confront ourselves honestly and choose humility over pride.

Another factor that often prevents inward change is our understanding of wisdom. Many people believe themselves to be wise—but what does that truly mean? And why does wisdom matter so much when it comes to change?

In the Epistle of James, we read:

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such ‘wisdom’ does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.” (James 3:13–18)

According to James, wisdom is revealed through humility and action. Yet when people claim wisdom out of envy or selfish ambition, their goal is not growth but recognition. They want to appear right rather than become righteous. This is not true wisdom; it is pride disguised as insight. Scripture describes it as earthly and unspiritual because it centers on self. And if I am convinced that I am already wise, why would I feel any need to change?

So what produces heavenly wisdom?

Heavenly wisdom is pure. It does not seek attention or status. It is peace-loving, not eager for conflict or self-justification. It is gentle and reasonable, willing to listen. It is full of mercy and good fruit, consistent and sincere. It values integrity over image. Heavenly wisdom would rather be righteous than simply win an argument. It expresses itself through humility and good deeds.

Dallas Willard once wrote, “When we submit what and where we are to God, our rule and domination then increases.” The pathway to a righteous life is submission and humility. The more we fight to defend our version of what is right, the further we drift from who we were created to be.

As God declares in the Book of Isaiah, “My ways are higher than your ways, and My thoughts are higher than your thoughts.” Since the beginning, humanity has resisted humility and submission, choosing pride instead. Yet pride and arrogance are the true enemies of inward change. True wisdom leads us away from self-exaltation and toward humble dependence on God—and it is there that real transformation begins.

The Non-Negotiable Man: Reflecting Christ in Marriage

I am currently reading through Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians as part of my personal study. I have read this letter many times before, but what I love about the Bible is that no matter how many times you engage with it, you will always find something new within its beautiful pages. As the author of Hebrews writes:

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

During this journey through 1 Corinthians, I encountered a passage I’ve read dozens of times, but today, my eyes were opened to see it with new intentionality. In Paul’s discourse on marriage and divorce, he writes:

“To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:10-11).

Did you catch the distinction? This isn’t just Paul’s advice; this is a command from the Lord Jesus Christ. It is directed at believers—those who claim Jesus as Lord and live in obedience to Him. Paul notes that while a wife should not separate, if she does, she has two options: remain unmarried or be reconciled.

However, the command to husbands is straightforward, with no “extra toppings”: Husbands must NOT divorce their wives. Period.

Why is this significant? Why are wives given a conditional “if she does,” while husbands are given a definitive “must not”? After some reflection and prayer, I reached a spiritual conclusion: It is about the Mirror.

God is the head of all things. He is faithful even when we are unfaithful. He is the Husband, and we—the Church—are His Bride. It is almost impossible to truly grasp the undying commitment God has for us; He is the ultimate example of true love.

In Genesis, we see the foundation of this bond:

“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’ … Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man… The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh…’ That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:18, 21-24).

Woman was formed for man—not as a slave, but as an indispensable partner who supplies what the man lacks. She is the final brushstroke of the masterpiece. Without her, man is incomplete.

So, why the “strict” line for husbands? Because the relationship between a husband and wife is a living picture of God’s relationship with His people. As Christian men, we are called to be the reflection of God in our marriage.

Just as God is forever bound to His Bride, we are tied to our wives. While we are sinners who will never do this perfectly, we are commanded to stay true to the covenant. God has never divorced Himself from His people; therefore, we must never divorce our wives.

This doesn’t mean a wife is free to come and go as she pleases—Paul explicitly says she should not separate. However, God recognizes that men are imperfect and can fail. If circumstances push a wife away, she may separate, but she must not seek another; she must look toward reconciliation.

Why are men held to such a rigid standard? Because we are called to be the head of the home, just as Christ is the head of the Church. We are responsible for our wives and our children. It is our duty to be the reflection of God to our families.

Man was created first and given the weight of responsibility. Woman was created to complete him. After thousands of years, the mandate has not changed: We are called to be the example of Jesus Christ to our families.

This is a non-negotiable standard. To do this well, we must be disciplined and diligent, staying rooted in the Word and in a close relationship with the Father.

My Encouragement to You
As a follower of Jesus, a husband, and a father, I encourage you to view your duties as permanent and foundational to who you are. Be the reflection of God in your home. When you fall short—and you will—be repentant, turn from your wrong, and seek the One who will never leave or forsake you.

Life is a Lesson: Are You Willing to Learn It?

Life is filled with ups and downs. It has a way of making us feel elated, and other times, feel like we are in the darkest of pits with no way of escape. Life is a maze of twists and turns, hills and valleys, and at times beautiful views from mountain peaks. What’s more is that life is a lesson to learn, and unless we are open and reflective, we can miss some of the most life changing lessons we were meant to learn.

We tend to struggle against learning. We will sit in darkness and blame anything and everything for why we feel the way we do rather than take the time to sit, reflect, and learn. We try and force ourselves out of the valleys and dark holes we find ourselves in, because it’s uncomfortable and it doesn’t feel good. However, it’s in those times that learning is at its best.

There is always something we can be learning in life. Remember, life is a lesson to learn. In school, we teach students to be life long learners. There is a reason for this. We are never done learning. We will never have it all figured out. There are times when we think we have it figured out, but I guarantee that a valley is coming, and there will be something new that we need to learn.

Pride keeps us from the beautiful lessons that we should be learning. We might think we have it all figured out, or we might think that it’s everyone else’s problem to figure out and not ours. We might think that others are the cause of our pain, frustration, or lack of joy and happiness. In truth, it is our lack of humility and willingness to reflect and learn that keeps us from growing and finding the peace, joy, and happiness that we so long to feel. Until we learn to sit in the darkness, reflect on our life and situation, and seek to understand the lessons we are being taught in life, we will always struggle finding peace in our life.

Learning is uncomfortable because it requires vulnerability. It forces us to admit that we don’t have all the answers and that there is still much we do not understand. We like to take a stand on our ideologies and worldviews. We naturally trust our own reasoning, and often we are right. However, if we aren’t careful, we risk convincing ourselves of truths that actually need to be re-examined. We often become so deadset on being right that we refuse to humble ourselves and ask questions. By choosing pride and ego over learning and growth, we trap ourselves in ignorance. This unwillingness to learn is often the very thing that ruins our relationships.

I offer this encouragement as someone who knows the valleys well, having chosen pride over growth more times than I care to admit. Take it from me: life becomes infinitely richer when you finally sit, reflect, and humble yourself to learn. It is uncomfortable, but the view from the summit is impossible without enduring the climb. Life is about learning, but if we choose pride over humility, we miss the invaluable lessons intended for us. By doing so, we ultimately hinder our growth and forfeit the joy and happiness we were meant to experience.

Repost: Be Strong and Courageous (Part 2)

“Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors’” (Joshua 1:6). Last time I discussed that strong and courageous leadership starts with submission to God. This time, I want to discuss how strong and courageous leadership means standing strong and being courageous in the face of adversity. 

To recap, God forbade an entire generation of Israelites from entering the promised land because of their unbelief and lack of faith. They wandered in the desert for forty years until that generation passed away. At the end of that period, the Lord called Joshua to lead the next generation into the land promised to their ancestors. (I covered this in more detail in my previous post, so I encourage you to read Part 1 if you haven’t already.)

It’s important to consider the kind of people Joshua “inherited” as a leader. Their parents had been known for complaining, doubting, and repeatedly showing a lack of faith—and after forty years of wandering with that generation, some of those attitudes undoubtedly rubbed off on their children.

After the Lord instructed Joshua to lead with strength and courage, and to keep the law given through Moses on his lips day and night, Joshua gathered the entire assembly of Israel. He shared with them what the Lord had commanded him. Their response was:

Just as we fully obeyed Moses, so we will obey you. Only may the Lord your God be with you as He was with Moses. Whoever rebels against your word and does not obey it, whatever you may command them, will be put to death. Only be strong and courageous. (Joshua 1:16-18).

“Only be strong and courageous.” Jericho was the first city the Lord told Joshua to conquer. However, there were specific rules that needed to be followed. For example, Joshua commanded: 

The city and all that is in it are to be devoted to the Lord. Only Rahab the prostitute and all who are with her in her house shall be spared because she hid the spies we sent. But keep away from the devoted things so that you will not bring about your own destruction by taking any of them. Otherwise you will make the camp of Israel liable to destruction and bring trouble on it. All the silver and gold and the articles of bronze and iron are sacred  to the Lord and must go into His treasury. (Joshua 6:17-19)

However, greed filled the heart of Achan, and he took some of the devoted items. Just as Joshua had warned, the Lord’s anger burned against Israel. When Joshua and the Israelites approached Ai, he sent scouts to assess the land. Upon returning, the scouts reported that only a small force was needed, “for only a few people live there” (Joshua 7:3).

Trusting their report, Joshua sent only a few thousand men into battle—but they were quickly defeated. Scripture records, “At this, the hearts of the people melted in fear and became like water.” Hardly the strong and courageous spirit they had been commanded to embody.

In despair, Joshua fell facedown before the ark of the Lord and cried out: 

Why did you ever bring these people across the Jordan to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us? If only we had been content to stay on the other side of the Jordan! Pardon your servant, Lord. What can I say, now that Israel has been routed by its enemies? The Canaanites and the other people of the country will hear about this, and they will surround us and wipe out our name from the earth. What, then, will you do for Your great name?” (Joshua 7:7-9)

What happened to “Be strong and courageous”? What happened to “Trust in the Lord”? The Lord’s response to Joshua is striking: “The Lord said to Joshua, ‘Stand up! What are you doing down on your face? Israel has sinned… That is why the Israelites cannot stand against their enemies’” (Joshua 7:10–11a, 12). The Israelites had created the problem—more specifically, one man had: Achan. His disobedience brought consequences on the entire nation. Ultimately, Achan’s sin was exposed, and he and his family were destroyed. (Side note: When God speaks, obey. Ignoring His commands leads only to destruction.)

It took just one military defeat for Joshua to lose his strength and courage. He began to whine and complain just as the previous generation had. He even questioned whether they should have crossed the Jordan at all. In the face of adversity, Joshua lost his composure, his courage, and his confidence. Rather than humbly seeking the Lord, he complained to Him about the situation. And how does God respond? With a command: “STAND UP!”

Anyone in leadership will tell you that adversity comes with the role. But when challenges arise, we have two choices:

  1. Fall on our face and complain, or
  2. Stand up and humbly seek the Lord’s guidance.

Joshua was called to lead with strength and courage. As I noted in my previous post, that begins with submission to God. From there, strong leadership requires standing firm in the face of adversity and seeking the Lord with humility. It is vital that we continually remember the command the Lord gave to Joshua:

Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips, meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. THEN you will be prosperous and successful. (Joshua 1:7-8)Leadership is not for the faint of heart—it requires strength and courage. Adversity will come, and when it does, don’t collapse into self-pity or assume the grass would have been greener elsewhere. Instead, stand up, humble yourself, seek the Lord, and be STRONG and COURAGEOUS!

Repost: Be Strong and Courageous (Part 1)

“Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors” (Joshua 1:6). These were the words the Lord spoke to Joshua when he succeeded Moses as the leader of Israel. But to fully understand their weight, we need to go back about forty years—back to the moment when God instructed Moses to send a man from each of the twelve tribes to scout the land of Canaan.

After forty days of exploring the land, the scouts returned to Moses and the entire assembly to give their report. Ten of the twelve spread fear among the people, describing the inhabitants as giants, the cities as heavily fortified, and the opposition as too powerful to overcome. But Joshua and Caleb—two of the twelve—stood apart. They were the only ones who encouraged the Israelites to trust the Lord and take possession of the land. Joshua and Caleb said:

The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into the land, a land flowing with milk and honey, and will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will devour them. Their protection is gone, but the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid of them. (Numbers 14:7-9)

After Joshua and Caleb spoke these words, the Israelite assembly even talked of stoning them. These were the same people who had witnessed the miraculous works of the Lord again and again, yet they continually complained, doubted, and feared for their lives—even though God had rescued them repeatedly. The Lord described them as a “wicked community” who had “grumbled” against Him. Because of their unbelief and lack of faith, He declared that they would not enter the promised land. The Lord said:

How long will this wicked community grumble against me? I have heard the complaints of these grumbling Israelites. So tell them, ‘As surely as I live, declares the Lord, I will do to you the very thing I heard you say: In this wilderness your bodies will fall—every one of you twenty years old or more who was counted in the census and who has grumbled against me. Not one of you will enter the land I swore with an uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. As for your children that you said would be taken as plunder, I will bring them in to enjoy the land you have rejected. But as for you, your bodies will fall in this wilderness. Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the wilderness. For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you.’ I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this wilderness; here they will die. (Numbers 14:27-35)

Forty years later, Moses is dead, and the Lord tells Joshua:

Moses, my servant, is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give to them – to the Israelites. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave or forsake you. Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors. (Joshua 1:2, 5-6)

The command to be strong and courageous is repeated four times in the first chapter of Joshua. In one of the commands, the Lord tells Joshua, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” The Lord, however, did not stop there. There were specific expectations that needed to be met: 

Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips, meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. THEN you will be prosperous and successful. (Joshua 1:7-8)

Listen to the command God gave Joshua: “Be strong and courageous!” Lead with meaning and purpose. Do not be afraid, and do not be discouraged. But notice what comes next—true success and prosperity begin with keeping the Word of the Lord always on our lips and meditating on it day and night.

What does that actually mean? It means we must continually immerse ourselves in Scripture. It becomes the foundation for our thoughts, actions, and decisions. It calls us to live with integrity—doing what is right no matter the cost—and to walk in a posture of humility and self-reflection. Read the Word of God, listen to what it says, and live it intentionally. As James reminds us, “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says” (James 1:22).

Yet we face countless distractions that pull our attention away from what is right: wealth, fame, power, status, resentment, selfish ambition, personal gain, and—perhaps most distracting of all—social media. These things weaken our character and our faith. They keep us from leading with strength and courage. Solomon wrote, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5–6).

Did you catch that? “In all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” It echoes God’s instruction to Joshua: “Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left.” Strong and courageous leadership begins with submission to God.

If you want your company, organization, nonprofit, team, family, or children to prosper, start by leading with strength and courage—and that begins with surrender.

The Redemption of Peter: From Bitter Denial to Restored Love

When Jesus was on trial, Peter, one of His closest followers, stood by watching. Recognized by the crowd, Peter was accused of being a disciple of Jesus. Three times he was challenged, and three times Peter adamantly denied knowing the Lord.

Peter’s betrayal was so crushing that, immediately after his third denial, he heard the rooster crow. Scripture tells us that Peter remembered Jesus’ prophecy—that he would deny Him three times before the rooster crowed—”and he went out and wept bitterly.” The Greek word for “bitterly” can be translated as “violently.” Peter didn’t just shed tears; he was overcome with such intense remorse and shame for denying the One he loved that his body was violently shaking.

The story, however, does not end with Peter’s guilt. Peter denied Jesus before the crucifixion, and one wonders if his overwhelming shame kept him away from the cross. In Luke’s Gospel, Peter re-enters the narrative after Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection. When the disciples received the staggering news that the tomb was empty, it was Peter and John who immediately ran to investigate. On the fourth day after his devastating denial, Peter is found running toward the empty tomb—a testament to hope triumphing over despair.

Later, in John’s Gospel, we witness the beautiful scene of Peter’s redemption. Sometime after the resurrection, the disciples had returned to fishing. Peter was still living with the crushing weight of his betrayal, having yet to receive reconciliation. Though he had seen the empty tomb and was present when Jesus appeared to the disciples, his denial had not yet been addressed.

As they were fishing, they saw Jesus standing on the shore. Peter, recognizing Him, didn’t wait for the boat to reach land. He plunged into the water and swam to the Lord.

As they were finishing up breakfast, Jesus turned to Peter and asked, “Do you love me?”

Jesus asked him this question not once, but three times. Each time, Peter’s heart was moved deeper. Why three times? Because Peter had denied Jesus three times, and three times Jesus offered restoration through the question of love. Jesus knew Peter’s heart, but Peter desperately needed to hear himself say what Jesus already knew. He needed to voice his love to heal the wound of his betrayal.

Peter was never too far gone for Jesus’ redemption. His denial did not push Jesus away; in fact, Jesus actively pursued Peter to restore him.

There is nothing we can do that will ever separate us from the love of Jesus Christ. We are sinners; we fail daily. Yet, Jesus has redeemed us through the Cross. Peter’s full restoration came after the death and resurrection, demonstrating that Jesus had to die to cover the sin. Peter was restored through love and grace, and the cross of Christ is what makes that redemption possible.

Whatever you have done, whatever you have said, there is nothing that will keep you from the redeeming grace of Jesus Christ. He is pursuing you, but He will never force you to follow. No matter how far you go, Jesus will always be one step behind, ready to welcome you. He loves you and wants to restore you. All you need to do is look to Him.

“But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor power, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39)