Weakness is a topic that is rarely talked about. We can be weak in many areas of our lives. We can be weak physically, in our mindset, our emotions, our fortitude, and many more. However, the aspect I want to focus on is our character. Our character should be the one aspect in our life that never falters, waivers, or shows any signs of weakness. After all, most areas in our life that are weak only affect us. Our character, however, affects others. A weak character builds weak relationships and hinders our potential. Through hard work and discipline, our weakness can be strengthened.
When I was a young boy, I had a big problem with anger. I vividly remember my father telling me, “If you don’t get a grip on your anger, it will cost you something later in life.” Being young, I wrote it off with, “Yeah, whatever.” Fast forward to the age of sixteen. I was home with my sister, who is 4 years older than I, and I needed to get some laundry done. Her laundry was in the washer, so I told her to move her clothes from the washer to the dryer. At this point, my memory of the situation gets a little blurred. The next thing I do remember is my sister and I yelling at each other, her trying to leave the house, and me grabbing her by the arm and throwing her against the wall.
“If you don’t get a grip on your anger, it will cost you something later in life.” That day, I lost nearly 4 years of relationship with my sister. I was devastated because of my choices and actions. I was hurt because I knew my actions caused the break in relationship. I wanted, more than anything, to reconcile with my sister, tell her how deeply sorry I was for my stupidity, and regain what I had lost. I say I lost nearly 4 years, but what that really means is it took 4 years for my sister to even consider being in the same room with me. My actions, the weakness in my character, destroyed the relationship with the only sibling I have.
Today, more than 20 years later, my sister and I are much closer than we were. However, time away has a funny way of building walls, barbed wire, and independence. My sister never needed me. She has never needed me. She is a strong, independent woman for whom I have great respect. However, because of my actions and weakness of character, I lost the ability to grow and build a relationship with her. If I could go back to that day, I would in a heartbeat.
I still struggle with anger, but I have learned to curve it and deal with it in a healthy way. Metal is my music of choice, body count movies are a great go to, but most of all, I humble myself before my God and learn to be more like Him. I have been focused on building a character of integrity, honesty, and humility. I have really tried to focus on building a better me. Don’t get me wrong, I have a LONG way to go, and I won’t be done until I see my maker face to face. Until then, I will constantly be working on me. I will constantly be strengthening my character, so that I can hold dear the relationships that matter most. If leadership is about one life influencing another, then our character should be the one aspect of our lives that we never quit working on.
With that, I challenge you. Stop being weak. Find the areas in your character that need to be fixed, reshaped, worked out. Build a character worth having. Become a man or woman of strong character. Live with integrity, be honest with yourself and others, and be humble enough to know you have work to do. Be a person/leader of strong character.
- Our character is the only aspect of ourselves that affects more than just us. A weak character builds weak or obsolete relationships.
- Reflection is key to becoming a better version of ourselves.
- It is never too late to restructure, rebuild, or fix our broken character.
- If leadership is about one life influencing another, then make sure your character is one that builds positive, uplifting relationships with those around you.
As always, stay humble and serve well.